Adversity is an occasional or even a constant companion for each of us throughout our lives. We cannot avoid it. It is a reality--and indeed one of the purposes--of mortal life. What is important is how we react to it. Will our adversities bear us down, or will we go forward relying on the promise of God, who does not shield us from every adversity but who gives us the guidance and strength that makes it possible for us to endure and progress?
Some people exploit their adversities to encourage others to look on them with pity and to place them in a special category that excuses nonperformance. Others, as father Lehi taught, accept their adversities and go forward, relying on God's blessing to help them do their best.
I've been trying for the past hour to write about a particular experience with Holden, but have been unable to. For some reason I can't shake the feeling that some might perceive it as an attempt for pity, and I can't stand the idea that someone might think I would exploit my son's suffering that way. Simultaneously, I can't ignore the increasingly nagging feeling that I need to not only record these events, but help others who may be struggling, much like Caitlin and I have been helped by mutual acquaintances of adversity.
So I guess I'm making this post as a disclaimer to put my mind at ease: I may write about personal and sacred experiences that at times will be kind of downers, because there are difficult things I want to write about. I will not do this to garner pity or attention. I will not allow myself to post anything that in any way does not feel genuine to me or fails to accurately reflect how I'm feeling. My aim and hope is that this can be an effective way for me to record important events and recurring sentiments. I, like many of my gender, tend to compartmentalize my emotions, and think this will be a therapeutic outlet for me.
So bear with me. I'm gonna talk about my son a lot. He's on my mind a lot. I love him and miss him. I don't show it most of the day, but it hurts to not have him here.
3 comments:
you post about what you want! no disclaimers needed. Blogs are personal. Its your space! and if someone ever thinks your doing it for pity its thier problem. :) I am at much agreeance that you should record your many experiences with Holden somewhere whether its here or there... they will be such a treasure.
Jared, I think many would agree with me when I say that so many would benefit from hearing more about Holden. He is a special spirit and we can all learn a lot from him, you, and Caitlin. You are a wonderful writer, too, and I thank you for your courage in sharing with us.
I don't know what to say...thank you for your words. We love to hear all about Holden. I know that anything that you share is not for pity. What a lucky boy Holden is to have parents as wonderful as you guys. I love that little boy and love to hear about it. I just have a hard times reading what you write through my watered eyes but thank you for sharing.
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